In the Coady Clan we still write out Christmas lists for what we want for Christmas. This is a way to ensure there are none of those useless presents every year and that everyone gets what they want. Every year from the age of 8 until... *mumble mumble* I have had a pony on the list. It is the leftover Christmas wish of my younger self. It is the continuity and also the family joke that I am sooooooo deprived because they never bought me one.
In fact below is the list they got this year (including my commentary)
"Hello Dearly Beloved 'Rents
I have made my list and I've checked it twice. I KNOW I'm ALWAYS NICE!
So here goes (you might see some familiar requests from previous years)
1. BOILER - monetary donation (new in at number one this year)
2. PONY (this is a seasonal favourite - comes round every year much like Cliff Richard's 'Mistletoe and Wine')
3. Noise cancelling headphones (a trend for these seem to be creeping into the Coady Clan but proved their worth during some building work)
4. Rigby & Peller Gift Certificate (an uplifting addition to any Xmas list)
5. Sherlock DVD (BBC remake from last year) (new in this year but sure to be a regular returnee as long as the BBC keeps making them)
6. Bones - Season 6 (an old favourite - the Xmas tree would be lost without it)
7. NCIS - Season 8 (nothing says Xmas like Mark Harmon saying 'Ya think?' - be still my heart!)
8. Vintage Dress Clips (a sparkling entry at number eight)
9. Kindle Light (to keep my reading going even in low light - i.e. when Mummy makes me turn my light out)
10. Filofax cover(Malden/Finchley/Aston) - Pocket sized - red, brown or black (going retro in my stationery)
That is my top ten. If anything changes I'll let you know.
Love your VERY NICE daughter
But what do I truly want for Christmas? What is on my REAL Christmas Wish List?
I think it would read something like this:
"Dear Father Christmas,
I know we haven't spoken for awhile. Are you well? Back still giving you jip?
If you happen to be in my vicinity on Christmas Eve I have rather a nice bottle of Sauvignon Blanc with your name on it. Have a few glasses, tell a few tales... interested?
Oh and if you are in the area if you could just, maybe, if it isn't too much trouble... see your way to the following:
1. A Literary Agent (you know if you just happen to have one on the sleigh)
2. A book deal (they sometimes come with agents in a bulk buy scheme)
3. A film deal (I know this is a bit out there but what the hell... yes I have already been at the sherry why do you ask?)
4. Benedict Cumberbatch (in for a penny in for a pound! *hic*)
5. World Peace
6. Cure for Cancer
7. Rich man (if you can make number 4 rich it is a toofer)
Love and kisses
What would be on your Christmas Wish List?
Come back on Sunday to find out whether Susanna has been naughty or nice